A Quick Yelp

I will start this off with a "Hi," followed with a more cordial "How're y'all doin?"

I have accumulated a wealth of adventure snippets over the past few days of moving and I feel confident tomorrow's post will be of value to those who know this simple truth: the world revolves around me. I'm resolved to convince you of the gravity my world, and I will do so. Just move back (9.8 meters)^2, and give me a second.

Today, I will leave you with an exchange I had with a good friend, via e-mail, back in October. I haven't heard back from Mimi... but these things take time.

Mimi Tahsin & Co. Address: Unit 23-7, Block B The Boulevard, Mid Valley City Lingkaran Syed Putra, Ku ala Lumpur, Malaysia. Dear Wesley King, Bearing in mind the nature of the content of this letter coming from a person without any referral, I apologize for any inconvenience, but please read and objectively consider if we can work together. I am Mrs. Mimi Tahsin, a legal practitioner with Mimi Tahsin & Co. This involves a foreign client of mine Late Mr. Adams King; who died as the result of a heart-related condition in April 11th 2005, His heart condition was due to the death of all the members of his family in the tsunami disaster on the 26th December 2004 in Malaysia which took the lives of thousands of every Nationalities, as being documented first page on: http://news.adventist.org/ data/2004/11/1104252432/index. html.en I am contacting you because you have the same surname as my deceased client and I felt that you could help me in the distribution of funding that were left in my deceased client's bank account. This funding is closed to be declared un-serviceable by the bank as there were no indicated next of kin or next of beneficiary of the funding in the bank account. My client had an investment on fixed deposit of value $12.5USD (Twelve Million Five Hundred Thousand (United States Dollars) deposited in a private bank here with no nominated successor in title over this investment. This bank has issued me a notice to contact the next of Kin, or the account will be confiscated and I want you to assist in distributing the money left behind, otherwise it will be sent to the treasury by the bank. I have already developed a full proof, legal and totally risk free means through which the fund can be released to you within a very short time after due documentation and authentication process. The strategy is to use my position and influence as the lawyer of the deceased to present you as the next of Kin and beneficiary of the deposit so that the proceeds of this account can be paid to you. I want to assure you that I have concluded all local modalities for the successful completion of this within 10 banking days of your agreement to proceed with me as the required assistance are perfected to be safe and without any breach of law. Please contact me at once to indicate your interest. I will like you to acknowledge the receipt of this e-mail as soon as possible via my private EMAIL: (mimitahsinesq3@gmail.com) and treat with absolute confidentiality and sincerity. I look forward to your quick reply. Best regards, Barrister Mimi Tahsin Esq. The information transmitted is a confidential and/or privileged material intended only for the person or entity to which it is addressed, if you received this in error, please contact the sender immediately and delete the material from your computer.

Wesley King to mimitahsinesq3

show details 10/26/08

Reply

Mimi,

Most of my current next of kin are of the deep-pocket persuasion. As it were, I prefer to only deal with transactions upward of $15.1 million US dollars Only. If you can scrape together Only $2.6 million US dollars more, then I would feel safe moving forward with this transaction.

Since you have extended upon to me an arm of good fortune and risk-free wealth, I propose toward you a 2 million US dollar Only maintenance fee. This fee will be yours to keep and do with as you wish. I would donate it to a Tsunami release fund. These funds aid the release of giant Tsunamis. As witnessed through the following link: www.TsunamiForMyMommy.com/index.html

Also, though my business name is Wesley King, among my friends I am known as Wet Wes, and I consider you one of my friends, so from this point in Time moving forward please refer to me either as "Mr. Wet" or The Powers that Be.

I hope this correspondence finds you both in good health and in the vicious vice of capitalism,

Mr. Wet

P.S. Please find attached a picture of a colorful Nudibranch. It was found in an inlet on a Malaysian beach three days after the Christmas tsunamis of '05. Since that time the Nudibranch has been diagnosed with mental starvation and a minor dose of constant inebriation. His last name is Tahsin. Might you and he be distant relatives? I do dearly hope so. Contact me for his e-mail...